Thoughts about Comments

In my opinion, the comments that are the most useful for me are the ones that ask questions. When they ask questions about my stories it helps me know where I was unclear in my writing. I know I have a tendency in my writing to leave items out because I know them in my head but I forget that other's cannot read my mind. So when they ask questions I can go back through and elaborate on the sections I did not give enough information. I also love all the compliments. It makes me feel very proud of my writing and makes me want to reciprocate that positive energy to the other stories I comment on.

As for my comments, I have not been doing very great with them. I missed a week of commenting. But for the other weeks I try to really analyze the stories and comment well. I need to slow down when reading the stories sometimes so I can give the most productive comments.

Storytelling Week Five: The Nightmares

Carried Away

Dear Diary,
The dreams have started again. Tonight I was sailing across the ocean. It was a beautiful deep blue. The air smelt like a combination of salt and fish guts. It was both amazing and disgusting at the same time. The crew was large, between our merchandise and our persons the ship barely stayed afloat. We stopped at many ports trading for goods and hoping to be profitable at the end of the trip. We ended up stopped at an island to explore some the large trees onshore we saw all the way from the ship. We discovered many delicious fruits and nuts. I ate myself full and laid down to tan in the warm sun. That is when I woke up. I am glad this one was a good dream, I was getting tired of all the nightmares. It makes me nervous to go to sleep tonight. I just never know what is going to happen. Wish me luck Diary!

Dear Diary,
Well, tonight it turned into a nightmare. I hope this doesn't become a trend again. I cannot afford to lose more sleep. In tonight's dream, I found myself alone on the beach. I looked all around and couldn't find any of my shipmates. At this point, my only option was to explore the island inward to try and find some help. As I was trekking my way through the thick brush I came to a massive nest with a single egg in it. Quickly I realized my only way to escape was to ride the massive bird who owns this egg off of this deserted island. When the bird returned I jumped on her, strapping myself to her leg. After a while she took off in search of food. When she came to her next resting spot I jumped off to take a look around. At this point I woke up sweating and my heart pounding. How scary, to be alone like that? Hopefully I won't have another dream, and if I do I hope it ends well. Dreaming about being left all alone on an island is not the best way to sleep at night.

Dear Diary,
It happened again. Another dream. Tonight I was back on the second piece of land. I had wandered upon a valley full of massive and beautiful diamonds. I started to gather all the ones I could carry in my pack. I figured they may come in handy later. I then started over the far hill to see what I could find. I came across a small village and after much negotiation and trading of my diamonds I found someone to take me home! I then woke up and was so thankful that this set of dreams had a happy ending!

Author's Note: This retelling is based off of one of Sindbad's voyages. In his voyage he gets forgotten on the island and had to ride a Roc to the next island. He then gathers diamonds there that he finds and rides an eagle to civilization. He then happens across the original ship that left him being reunited with all his goods and a trip home. For my retelling I wanted to write from the point of a diary and this voyage taking place in dreams over a couple nights. I tried to stick to the original plot for the most part because it is such an interesting story.

Bibliography: The Arabian Nights' Entertainments by Andrew Lang and illustrated by H. J. Ford (1898).

Week Five Reading Diary cont: Voyages of Sindbad

Fifth Voyage: He built his own ship that ended up being destroyed by Rocs who dropped boulders on it. He swam ashore and was made captive by a crazy old man. He escaped by getting him drunk and running away eventually finding his way back with riches.
Sixth Voyage: He set off again getting caught in a current that crashed the ship into a mountain. To escape the deserted area he rode a raft down a stream that went underground when he emerged he was taken care of and helped home.
Seventh Voyage: He did not want to leave since all of his troubles at sea but his king wants him to run an errand and he couldn't say no. The voyage there went smoothly but on the way back he was kidnapped by pirates and sold in the slave trade. He worked as a slave killing elephants for months until he found their burial ground and made his owner very rich. He was then granted freedom to return home.

The Arabian Nights' Entertainments by Andrew Lang and illustrated by H. J. Ford (1898).

I just love elephant images

Week Five Reading Diary: Voyages of Sindbad

First Voyage: It started out making me think about the biblical story Jonah and the whale
he floated to shore and met some men who took him inland to the king who kept him safe until his original ship passed back through and he sailed home to buy a new place to live.
Second Voyage: He gets left on a deserted island because he isn't smart enough to tell someone he is setting down for a nap so they don't leave him. Then a bird takes him to diamonds which he smartly gathers many off then meets some merchants and finds his way home. he then gives money to the poor which is pretty cool
Third Voyage: this is the one that is like the Greek legend where they stab the one eyed giant in the eye to blind of their escape. This man has great luck that he keeps finding the ships that he was originally lost from so he never really loses his money or merchandise. Also is surprises me that him and the captain do not recognize each other at first. For someone you are stuck on a ship with you would think you would recognize them
Fourth Voyage: This is probably the most wild one yet. He is shipwrecked and survived and was saved and taken to another king who then decided he wanted Sindbad to stay on his land so he married Sindbad off. Then Sindbad learns that when his wife dies it is customary to be buried alive with her. His wife eventually falls ill and dies and he is buried alive. He find a hole to sneak out of and finds a valley full of jewels. He was down a ship who then carries him home.

The Arabian Nights' Entertainments by Andrew Lang and illustrated by H. J. Ford (1898).

Roc carrying an elephant